Thursday, September 24, 2009

ding dong schoolyard - Snippets from Traffic School!

In Minnesota, when I learned how to drive, traffic school was available as a remedy for some traffic infractions, including speeding...it was known as "ding-dong" school.  The following are from an actual online "ding-dong" school!

The split second before your head hits the windshield isn't the time to remember to fix that malfunctioning safety belt. 

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The key is to drive defensively, which means defending yourself as you drive.
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Scan ahead and think ahead for hazards or potential hazards. By looking ahead, you allow yourself the opportunity to see hazards early
----------PlanAHEAD's Motto!  (inside joke, shareholders only!)

Glass bottles, nails, and other sharp items can be detrimental to your tires.
----------wins the "duh" or perhaps the Homer Simpson "D'oh!" Award...

Backing up is definitely not the time to mistakenly hit the throttle.
--------too bad the D'oh Award's been awarded!

Preview
  • When the level reaches beyond this, to 0.25 and 0.40, you'd better call an ambulance because the average person will be in a coma.
     
  • Levels of 0.45 and up, you'd better call the police; the average person will be dead. 
'nuff said...

Everyone else is driving along a freeway at 55 mph while the person on LSD is drifting along a beautiful street lined with flowers in full bloom.
(Well, if "everyone else" is on the freeway, the Acid Head is only being safe, on that flowery residential street!)

The existence of bicyclists on the road is cause for concern when you are driving. As with pedestrians, they can be seriously injured in any impact with a vehicle.
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Congratulations!

You passed the final exam!

You got 48 questions correct.